Have you ever loved someone, but not appreciated them as you should have? In time you develop relational problems and what results are issues so complex and significant that no matter how much you try, you just cannot seem to right the wrong?
Two days ago I sat down and spoke with a friend who had just finalized his divorce. It had been a very draining battle that required him to submit everything to God. There were days that seemed as though he would not make it through to the next, days where he didn't know who he was anymore, and nights where he could forget who he was. In the midst of that, there was an ever abiding love for his wife. He knew he wasn't the perfect husband, but he had hoped and prayed that God, in His infinite wisdom, would find some way to unite he and his wife again. But alas, the day came when the paperwork was signed and the marriage covenant was legally absolved.
As the moment arrived, clarity and peace of mind came over him. As the paperwork was coallated and the parties gathered in the room God gave him the assurance that He wasn't finished, that though the marriage was being legally absolved, God wasn't done fighting for her soul, and He wasn't finished fighting for their marriage.
For years he had been battling through his pain and anger while trying to understand those same emotions in his wife. The issues had been pulling both of them in a thousand directions. As the topic of divorce would surface, fear would fill his heart as it would any father and husband who loved his family. A fear that divorce would somehow be the final blow, but on that fateful day God assured him that it was not over.
I believe it was then that my friend finally gave the care of his wife over to God in a way that he had not done before. I know he had given her to God, but there was something more complete about it this time. I believe that in our "infinite wisdom" we try to hang onto the things that need to be let go of. Now hear me out. I am not advocating divorce or abandonment. I am simply saying that sometimes we fight God's battles. If we trusted God to fight the battles that many times we fight, more often than not, the outcome could be different. Our limited ability to see into the heart of another and our total lack of understanding the path that God has mapped out means that we ought not fight a battle that we are not designed to fight.
In regards to my friend, I cannot say whether that is true of him or not. What I do know, is that when all control was removed from him, he finally had peace. Maybe that is what we need to be seeking all along. Maybe we need to pray to be shown how to give God control in order to learn to be at peace when not at the helm. I believe it is only when we recognize our own weakness that we can see and stand in awe of God's tue strength. Only then can we exemplify the true faith that is necessary to do the type of work that needs to be done.
I have learned a lot from my friend. His trials, struggles, and strengths through this incredibly trying time have enriched my relationship with God. I can see a lot of myself in my friend and I only pray that if ever in a similarly trying time, I might remain as spiritually submitted as he.
What battles are you fighting that aren't yours to fight? Is there something in your life that requires you to get out of the way so that God can have a direct line of sight to His intended target? Is there something you are holding onto that is preventing God from reaching you? Are you trying to hold onto something that has to be set loose in order to find it's way home? The truth is, only God can answer those questions. Each and every one of who who relate to tis will only relate to it because of God's still small voice whispering in your ear.
Tonight I am praying for my friend. Tonight I am praying that he holds onto the assurance that he received through that peace, that he has a strangle hold on the truth that God is in control. I am also praying that my eyes be opened to the things that I am holding onto that stand between myself and God or between my wife and God. Life is too short to spend it separated from the Lord. All I know is that the closer I move towards God, the more I realize that I need Him. May that be your realization today as well.
In His Service,